The Secret to HappinessShannon Laver
Today alot of people are going through life, day to day, doing the same old thing and not feeling happy about it.
I was one of them!
When we had to close our business some years ago I felt lost because I was not doing what I loved. Then the negative thoughts started to take over and left me feeling like that whatever I created I could not hold onto. Basically I felt like a failure and gave up on my dreams.
In February 2012 we had moved to a great new estate where the children were safe to roam and Steve got the Ok to start work again. I got offered to go to an internet summit that taught people how to create business online. While attending a man by the name of Rich Waterman was on stage talking about having a rich mindset so that you can create what you want, I knew right there and then I had to work with this guy so I would never give up on my dreams again. I signed up to his program and have not looked back.
Through participating in his program we have now created this blog to share what we love and also started to advertise our expertise online through our Facebook page. We are currently building our websites to go with it.
The fire of passion has reignited again and I am very grateful to be working with this program now. Without this positive reinforcement we would not be here to share with you today.
Here is one of Rich Waterman's newsletters that I have been given permission to share with you, it explains a simple technique that you can use to assist you in creating happiness in your life.
The subject of this newsletter is THE SECRET OF HAPPINESS.
By Rich Waterman
So if I could put happiness into a jar and sell it, I would be a “rich” man indeed.
Well no happiness jars I’m afraid! Not yet!
Are you happy?
Do you know people that aren’t happy?
Do you know people that aren’t happy that use blame a lot?
They blame other people, they blame things, they blame circumstances and sometimes they blame themselves.
I have written a whole newsletter on blame. It doesn’t solve anything. It just moves a bad feeling around. Don’t do it!
So what is the secret of happiness?
You are happy when your life is how you think it should be.
Tony Robbins describes it as:
LC = BP
Your life conditions (LC) equal your blueprint (BP).
We can change a lot about our life conditions – get a new job, move house, clear up your house, change who we spend time with etc. This is the easiest area to start with and I work with clients on goal setting to achieve these changes, but inevitably there will be things we cannot change.
There may be a number of reasons why we are tied into a job, can’t control how people behave at work, we may have to live in a certain area, have people in our life who we care about but who don’t always make us happy etc.
So there will be things in your life that you can’t control. If you could control everything then life would be dull so don’t try and go down that route. You will get frustrated and you don’t want the outcome anyway.
So what to do? Well to balance the equation of LC=BP we need to look at our blueprint (BP). So that is the meaning we attach to things.
So do you even know what your blueprint is?
Take a moment now and write down all of the emotions that you have felt in the last few weeks. Brainstorm the list. Write down the complete list – positive and negative emotions.
The more positive emotions you have written down, generally that indicates an enriched life.
Put a star next to the 5 positive emotions that resonate with you and a star next to a couple of the most powerful negative emotions.
Make two lists. Positive emotions and negative emotions. Put them into order with the most powerful at the top.
Now you have a choice.
First of all does the order of those emotions need to change? Or do you need to let go of some altogether? Or do new ones need to come in?
Secondly. What rules do you have for those emotions?
In coaching we call these emotions VALUES.
If you have a menu of rules that are easy to feel, then you will access that emotion/value on a regular basis:
I feel love anytime I smile at my children OR I spend time with my fiancée OR I ring my family.
All easy and all in my control and lots of ORs.
The problems occur when you have rules like that for negative emotions!
If you have a set of rules that have a lot of conditions in them and that are hard to meet and when the rules are not in your control, you could be in trouble if these rules apply to a positive emotion:
I only feel love if my children behave all the time AND my fiancée texts me at least 20 times a day AND my family say they love me every time they ring me.
So I’m not going to feel love as often in the second case because I have lots of ANDs and the outcome isn’t in my control.
Isn’t it better to apply these sort of rules to negative emotions?
I only feel inappropriate stress if I forget that most things won’t matter in even a week’s time AND I forget to breathe properly AND I don’t spend enough time with people I love AND I forget my resourcefulness.
Harder to feel stressed already!
How do you change?
You must interrupt the old rules. Catch yourself doing it. Write down what the old rules were and cross them out. What did those old rules truly cost you?
Write down your new rules and look at them and apply them daily for at least 21 days to form a new habit.
This is the first area to work on in the Success Mindset Program and I was surprised at how many rules I had, no wonder I was un-happy. Just using this first technique I was able to discover where I was stopping myself from creating happiness in my life and decided to change my rules so that I could.
If you would like to do the same watch the video that explains in detail how to use the above technique for yourself. You have nothing to lose and happiness to gain, we all deserve to be happy and you can create it, all you need to do is take action!
Watch a free video on Values and Fulfillment from "The Gym Of Greatness" Success Mindset Program
If you would like to find out more on Rich Waterman and this program visit here "The Gym Of Greatness" Success Mindset Program
I urge you to take advantage of this free offer and even become a member of this great program. Steve and I wish you luck on your journey of discovering what it is that stops you from creating real happiness in your life.
We have read many books and done many short courses in business, and the importance of a positive mindset, but this program is one of the best. Next week we will share another technique that you can use from this great program, until then take good care of yourself and stay positive!
Thank You For Reading